Nikki found new depths of strength after her cancer diagnosis
Rediscovering joy through breast cancer diagnosis
The words you hope never to hear – “It’s breast cancer…” – are hardly likely to inspire joy.
Nikki rediscovered joy during cancer
Yet, through challenge comes unexpected strength. With conscious effort, a change of focus brings fresh perspective and, with it, a capacity for re-discovering joy.
It started with awareness of little things, as I learnt new skills in mindfulness and gratitude journalling.
Red Admiral butterfly
Connecting with music and nature
For example, I developed a renewed appreciation of the natural world – seen initially through a chemo fog, but which gradually dissipated.
A red admiral butterfly, a little owl, sunrise – all glorious in their uniqueness, yet easily accessible in my garden.
Connecting to favourite songs before difficult conversations with breast surgeons and oncologists, not only lifted, but also entirely changed my mood.
Goodness only knows what Diana Ross’s State of Independence was doing in that particular play list in my head, but it was loud, prominent and helpful. It was music I could run to and make me feel better.
Nikki’s Cancer Kit contained items she never knew she needed, including soft, fluffy sock (good for cold feet) and soft bristle toothbrushes for sore gums
Celebrating medical milestones
This appreciation then spreads to medical milestones, which are worth ticking off and celebrating along the way. Cancer Support UK’s Cancer Kit (containing thick fluffy socks, soft bristled toothbrushes and lemon sherbet sweets, which I never knew I needed), ringing the chemo bell, finishing challenging medication after two solid years of twice daily doses, complete with debilitating side effects.
Bouquets of flowers from friends helped Nikki feel less alone
The importance of friendships
“Where your focus goes, your energy flows.”
We have the power, even in difficult moments, to choose joy. To “control the controllable” as a beautifully engraved gold bracelet – a gift from a friend – reminds me on a daily basis.
And boy, do those friendships matter. Accepting that “no woman is an island” was probably one of my wisest moves at that time. Some friendships were lost along the way, but the ones that remained were, as it turns out, the most important, and a constant source of joy, to this very day, four years after my diagnosis.
From the incredible support of school friends I’ve known for nearly five decades now, and others, who gave me beautiful spring bouquets, motivational cards, jigsaws and doorstep-drop casseroles, to a business mastermind group who surprised me in a Zoom meeting by wearing matching Deborah James “Rebellious Hope” t-shirts. Each and every one of these beautiful acts brought more joy than I could ever have imagined or hoped for in my darkest hours.
Nikki’s three young children kept her going throughout her cancer journey
Why family matters
And then there’s my family – especially my kids. The three of them (who were ten, nine and eight years old at the time of my diagnosis), kept me going. Not just in a functional way, but joyfully, too, as we laughed together at the ridiculous colourful chemo turban I wore. They tried on my wig, pretending to be rock stars, while playing air guitar. And wrote in chalk on the patio flagstones: “Mum, U R The Best.”
As with every birthday, Christmas, school sports’ day or other landmark event, making these memories becomes even more meaningful given the gravity of the situation. They instil a deep sense of pride and joy, which, oddly enough, I’d never truly appreciated before.
Hugs with her kids, helped energise Nikki
And the hugs. The hugs that you breathe in and smell. That send your body coursing with energy; overwhelming, unadulterated love; life. And joy. Right there. In the midst of it all.
It’s there if you choose to find it. I promise.
And it lasts a lifetime.
Creating kinder cancer care
Every cancer story shared has the power to help someone feel less alone, spark understanding, or inspire kinder, more compassionate care.
If this story moved you, please consider sharing it – you never know who might need these words today. If you have been affected by cancer yourself, we would also love to hear your story. Every voice matters.
If you or someone you care about is going through treatment, you can order a free Cancer Kit for practical support and reassurance. You can also find connection through our free Cancer Coach services, all designed and delivered by people with lived experience of cancer.
And because cancer doesn’t stop at the workplace, we also deliver Workplace Cancer Support Training to help organisations build confidence, compassion and practical skills to support colleagues and have more sensitive conversations with customers and clients.
